Shout Out Health

SCOTUS Marriage Ruling EXCLUSIVE: "A Traditional Wedding in the Arizona Desert"

They poured into Prince of Peace Lutheran church in Scottsdale by the hundreds, on a glorious, sun-drenched April afternoon. The youngest attendee (festively adorned in a lacy white head bow) was no more than a few months old, while some others looked to be well past 90. Some arrived in sparkly Mercedes convertibles, draped in designer labels, while others wore casually comfortable polo shirts and sun dresses. Next-door neighbors and passers-by would have assumed a Saturday church service or concert was at hand. In a way, they were right.
A traditional Lutheran service (led by the phenomenal Rev. Rick Sherrill), along with communion and some dazzling music, were indeed part of the program. But this bright, picture perfect scene, draped in love, peace, deep spirituality and loyal community, would also enrage and/or outrage thousands of Arizona residents, not to mention some (maybe most?) of the GOP Presidential candidates.

The marriage of long-time Scottsdale residents Jim Taylor, 62, a semi-retired pharmacist, and Dr. Allen Quie, 49, an Arizona schools district principal, certainly wasn’t the first gay wedding held in Arizona since it became legal in 2014.

That said, it surely had to be one of the biggest in the state’s admittedly short history -- 400 plus guests, representing a wide swath of religions, ages and backgrounds. Guests flew in from places like North Dakota (both grooms’ home state), California, New York, and Illinois. Many were Prince of Peace members. Many were Mormon, while others were Presbyterian, Catholic, Jewish, and Protestant. But everyone shared one thing in common: an abiding love, respect and support for the beaming couple, who had been together 23 years before this seemingly impossible day became possible.

The mix of attendees was wide, and the random reception chatter (“Oh, those Methodists!” chuckled one, while another exclaimed, “Are you a sinner? We’re ALL sinners…”) reminded me that religion remains at the center of the vast majority of lives in this state. It’s a hot topic. Being at this wedding was an act of love, but for many neighboring churches, it could be heresy as well.

Sensing a large gay wedding might be ‘news’ (given the media attention to the ongoing marriage fight in places like Alabama and religious freedom laws in Indiana and Arkansas), Jim Geldien, the best man in the wedding - and a prominent real estate and interior designer with a long list of wealthy Valley clients — pitched the story to a friend/contact at the Arizona Republic. “She wouldn’t go near the story,” said Geldien, who recently left their long-time Paradise Valley church with his husband, Mark Ficklin (they were married recently in Hawaii after 30 years together) due to a ‘no gays’ policy for church leadership.

As a long-time New Yorker, hearing this is sad — actually shocking — stuff. Yet the tears shed during the moving, emotional ceremony weren’t gay tears, they were human ones. How can everyone not see this?

Thankfully, many do see and know -- in fact, the overwhelming majority of the wedding’s guests were straight and Republican. They attended because of their obvious love and support for two men they knew as gay, but also knew as neighbors, congregation members, co-workers, as a son, brother, or nephew. This is what face-to-face relationships will do to those literal interpretations of the Bible (eating shellfish is also an ‘abomination’ in Leviticus, right?). Who with a beating Christian heart and spirit could experience the overwhelming, loving energy in the Prince of Peace church and define this long-term loving and dedicated relationship as an ‘abomination’? Impossible!

TRAVEL/SPA: Finding "Enchantment" for Your Mind/Body/Spirit

Seeking solace and healing for the mind, body and spirit has become something of an obsession in today’s fast-paced, technology-driven culture. But when it comes to global spa destinations, it’s hard to imagine a more ideal convergence of all things wellness than Mii amo, the spa located on the grounds of Enchantment, a 70-acre resort five miles northwest of Sedona, Arizona.

Whatever your current passion -- balancing your chakras, fine-tuning your backhand, soaking up sun or just dazzling your senses -- odds are exceedingly high you'll find myriad outlets for all of your desires at Enchantment, tucked almost magically amidst the majestic red rocks of Boynton Canyon, also home to a handful of the world’s most sought-after energy vortexes.

The experience can be whatever you want it to be – the sheer luxury, wellness, fitness and/or rejuvenation options are endless -- but Enchantment’s unique geography helps make this destination uniquely extraordinary.

Here is a sampling of my recent visit:

GOOD VIBRATIONS: There are four main vortexes, or energy centers, in Sedona. By definition, an energy vortex amplifies the energy brought into it, so letting go of those pesky negatives in your life during your stay thus becomes a top priority. In a moment of stillness, you can literally feel the swirling electromagnetic energy in the earth, and begin to feel more balanced. And with eye-popping, utterly unique beauty in every direction -- whether you’re tucked into a lounge chair next to the Mii amo spa’s crackling fireplace, soaking in the rejuvenating Jacuzzi or sipping organic herbal tea from the resort’s magnificent red rock framed balcony – shifting your focus to good-feeling vibrations suddenly seems second nature. You don’t have to be a Zen master to align with the energy here; it just seems to happen.

HIKING INTO THE VORTEX: With an ongoing chorus of "Oh my God, it's beautiful!" coming roughly every 8 seconds from my hiking companion, we took the easy-paced, scenery-rich Vista Trail hike, which starts just outside the Mii amo entrance. All towering cliffs and buttes, the mile long hike leads up to the tall red rock spire known as the “Kachina woman.” Of the four main vortexes in Sedona, one of the strongest is in this spot, where native tribes still hold private ceremonies. This meditative symphony of steps gets your blood pumping and your spirit flowing; it’s a slow winding incline set against the rich, spiritual splendor of mother earth. This hike is the very definition of a ‘walking meditation’ as each step and meandering curve in the red-earthed path exposes something new and potentially dazzling; sun spontaneously bouncing off each layer of rock, creating seemingly endless hues of color (dominated by rouge and ocher) that spark the imagination and lift the spirit.

ANYTHING BUT ORDINARY SPA TREATMENTS: Mii amo’s astounding assortment of specialty treatments breaks far beyond the usual scrubs, polishes and pampering, with many intended to create deeper levels of healing. Amidst such spectacular scenery, it's ironic that the spa’s ultimate journey encourages you to look inward. It’s certainly no surprise to find that Mii amo is home to some of the most gifted, intuitive therapists anywhere in the world. "It's Sedona,” explains Francesca, one of the spa’s more than 100 skilled practitioners, “that's really the draw, and everyone comes here to live a spiritual life to the best of their ability." Specialty treatments like “Soul Seeker” and ‘Inner Quest” highlight the incredibly diverse menu; I sampled the “Intentional Aromatherapy Massage” which combined traditional Swedish massage and aromatherapy blended specifically to align with an intention (I chose ‘abundance’) of my choice. To say I was rejuvenated -- and vibrating in feelings of abundance -- after this one-of-a-kind treatment would be an understatement. I felt transformed at a deep, cellular level. In addition to the array of massages, facials and body wraps, you can dip into astrology, aura reading, past-life regression, hypnosis and reiki healing.

A VERY SPECIAL SPACE: Just before my session, I joined one of the spa’s daily guided meditations in the phenomenal “Crystal Grotto” circular meditation room, which featured natural crushed red rock floors and showcasing a massive crystal centerpiece and majestic sky light. This unique sensory recipe conspired to make “going inward” seem like the most natural thing in the world. -- Mitch Rustad

 

Effeminate Gays, Enlightenment and Russell Tovey

Looking actor Russell Tovey’s controversial remarks to The Guardian set off a firestorm in recent days – should an effeminate gay man be celebrated as they are or ‘toughened up’ so they can fit in? – and rightfully so. But though the actor quickly apologized via Twitter (where else?), one aspect of his story is also worthy a closer look. Here’s the quote in question:

… I’d see groups of lads, even in a pub, and I’d feel intimidated…The pack can sense you’re weak. It made me so frustrated. And going down the gym, discovering the gym three years ago, and really going for it – I feel a lot more in charge. I needed to exorcise that feeling of being a little scared, skinny rat.”

How many gay men have turned to the gym, to muscle-building and sculpting a perfect body -- just as Tovey (shown here in a pic a reader sent to Attitude) described -– believing that was gay life’s Holy Grail? And how many just as quickly use those new-found muscles as justification to bully, demean and dismiss other gay men, especially on Grindr, Scruff and other online dating apps?

It’s a fascinating parallel Universe of sorts, with no easy or definitive answers. But does Tovey really look down on skinny, effeminate gay men (which he himself says he was) as some inferior species gone wrong, an attitude widely shared on many of those online dating/hookup profiles? Is hitting the gym and becoming ‘hot’ really a gay man’s only salvation? Or is being loved as you are the far greater solution, as Noah Michelson wrote so eloquently in the Huffington Post?

Not everyone’s lucky enough to have that kind of unconditional love, of course. And going to the gym is an empowering, healthy choice. But the pervading belief that hitting the gym, bulking up, and then passing for ‘hot’ as the go-to solution for a traumatic childhood of bullying – basically the gist of the Guardian article -- has to evolve. Period.

VIDEO: "Away" On World AIDS Day - A Powerful Look Back

This heart-tugging World AIDS Day music video for the song "Away" by Sam Salmond was inspired by The Ashes Action, the 1992 ACT UP march that culminated in men and women throwing their loved ones' ashes onto the White House lawn to protest the government's neglect of those impacted by the AIDS crisis.

Brooklyn-based composer Salmond is asking viewers to make a donation to one of the following wonderful AIDS charities: AIDS Healthcare Foundation, Gay Men’s Health Crisis, or Elton John AIDS Foundation.

Ariana Grande vs. Bette Midler...Do Pop Divas Really Have to Sexualize Every Song to Succeed?

Sometimes we just can't resist getting in the middle of a juicy pop culture battle, so here goes...

When legendary diva Bette Midler recently took Ariana Grande to task for over-sexualizing her music (prompting this retort), it echoed similar recent comments of discontent from the likes of Annie Lennox, Sinead O' Connor and Joni Mitchell over the young female pop stars seemingly extreme attempts to sell their music and ignite social media through sex, sex and more sex.

Do these legengdary stars have a point? Is talent being shuttled to the background, all to simply shock and titilate audiences (and boost Twitter followers)? Does anyone have the moral high ground here? Maybe a quick, stunning look at the peak-form of one of history's all-time divas, Judy Garland - certainly no stranger to the unique pressues faced by current young stars like Grande, Cyrus and others -- showing us that real talent can still grab our attention without an assist from Victoria's Secret.

Now it's your turn. Are today's stars like Grande putting sex appeal above their musical talent/performance? Do Bette, Joni, Annie and friends have a valid point, or are they just out of touch with today's pop culture realities? Take a look at Judy's classic peformance and leave your comments!

Apple CEO Tim Cook Comes Out: What Will Be Your Brick on the 'Path Toward Justice'?

In what may be the biggest 'coming out' of all -- and that includes Ellen DeGeneres, George Michael, Elton John, and maybe even Michael Sam -- Apple CEO Tim Cook declared to the world a long-rumored but never publicly declared truth, stating "I am a proud gay man" in an op ed for BloombergBusinessweek.com.

Homophobic business and financial leaders, and conservative politicians probably share limited respect for prowess in music or the arts, but when the global leader of arguably the world's most talk-about and valued brand adds himself to this ever-growing 'out and proud' list, it changes the game (except in places like Russia).

The fact remains in our society that success, money and power equals respect, and can also shatter stereotypes. Cook is without doubt one of the world's most influential, powerful business leaders, so it's safe to say that homophobia in the boardroom will be more frowned upon than ever thanks to Cook's declaration.

In his thoughtful piece, the 53-year-old Cook also speaks to something equally important -- there is no singular definition of 'out and proud' anymore. To be sure, the LBGT community owes a mountain of debt to those brave souls - such as Harvey Milk, Larry Kramer, and so many others -- whose coming out paved the way for massive progress such as gay marriage and other civil rights victories.